Change, the only constant thing in my life right now. Since graduation all that has been thrown into my life is change. Everything seems to be changing around me while I stay put, but in the smallest way all this change has had the biggest effect on me. It has been a very hard 6 months and I may have had a few melt downs, but I have grown so much as person.
As I have been making plans for my future, I cant help but think if I am making the right choice. My plan was to attend SUU next August, but just last night I was having doughs once again. My friends are home for the weekend from SUU, and as they talk about all their friends and everything that happens, I cant help but think if I will be able to fit into this life of theirs. Will I ever has such as good a friendship as they have? I don't want to have to be fit into their lives, be scheduled in, or feel like a burden to them. My heart is, and has been, so set on going to SUU I just don't know if I should take this huge leap.
Last night driving home from Jenny's house, this song came on my IPod that I feel sums up everything, and I thought I would share the first little bit of the song. Its by Taylor Swift and its called "A Place in this World."
I don't know what I want, So don't ask me, cause I'm still trying to figure it out.
Don't know what's down this road,
I'm just walking.
Trying to see through the rain coming down.
Even though I'm not the only one,
that feels the way I do.
Got the radio on, my old blue jeans,
And I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve. Feeling lucky today, got the sunshine.
Can you tell me what more do I need?
And tomorrow's just a mystery, oh yeah,
but that's okay.
I'm alone, on my own, and that's all I know.
I'll be strong, I'll be wrong,
Oh, but life goes on.
Oh, I'm just a girl, trying to find a place in this world.
Don't know what's down this road,
I'm just walking.
Trying to see through the rain coming down.
Even though I'm not the only one,
that feels the way I do.
Got the radio on, my old blue jeans,
And I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve. Feeling lucky today, got the sunshine.
Can you tell me what more do I need?
And tomorrow's just a mystery, oh yeah,
but that's okay.
I'm alone, on my own, and that's all I know.
I'll be strong, I'll be wrong,
Oh, but life goes on.
Oh, I'm just a girl, trying to find a place in this world.
Right now I don't really know what I want, and I am just trying to figure that out. On of my favorite quotes comes from the movie Kung Fu Panda, and it sums up everything, "Yesterday is history, tomorrow's a mystery, and today is a gift, that's why it's called the present." I just need to take this gift and run with it, my road is clear and a mystery, and I just need to uncover it, and see what's in store for me and where I fit in. After all, I am just a girl, trying to find a place in this world.
Aaaa Kaiters. I wish you were out there with you. This is a really tough time. A lot of decisions. But, I have learned that even during those times of uncertainty Heavenly Father has a plan and you will be able to look back and say things like, "That is why that happened the way it did."
ReplyDeleteI hope you are able to feel good about whatever decision you make about school. And, don't forget to have fun along the way (wink, wink.)
You have done well Kaitlyn--since your parents abandoned you.
ReplyDeleteMy Sister! You are the best you know that!? Being able to choose and have agency is the best gift of all! I think sometimes having that choice can be scary, but as T said, if we just counsel with the Lord (Alma 37:37) he'll led us aright. On that same note, don't take counsel from your fears! If it is the right choice then go for it!
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